Motivational story (tag those who you think might need a boost) - read in full, pls 

I had been feeling like shit for around 6 months. Suicidal thoughts were a weekly occurence in the better times, but sometimes I felt the urge daily.

Everything I did, someone had already done and better. Nothing was new, I just followed people in their footsteps.

Furthermore, I beat myself up for everything I COULD NOT do. Nothing I did could be enough, because there was SOMEONE better at something else.

Motivational story (tag those who you think might need a boost) - read in full, pls 

This was no way to live. It forced me to hate everyone around me. I despised people, since anything they were, I was not, and it pissed me off. If someone praised me, it just bounced off.
"You're just saying that."
"Anyone could do it."

I did my OSWP. No one else I know IRL had this level of skill at the time I did it. I was the ONLY ONE. Yet it wasn't good enough for me.

This was no way to live.

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Motivational story (tag those who you think might need a boost) - read in full, pls 

This phase of "I'm not good enough for anyone" really came to a head the moment my GF came back from a language course. We went to a bar, she got a little drunk, and after that she told me these magic words:

"I don't know if I want to be with you anymore."

She told me she was fantasizing about other men... men she'd like to sleep with. Men fitter than myself.

All this even during sex.

I felt disgusted.

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Motivational story (tag those who you think might need a boost) - read in full, pls 

At that moment, I said the words I never thought I'd say:

"Break up with me, then. I just want you to be happy, with or without me."

Sure, a nice act of kindness, I sincerely wanted her to be happy. 8.5 years had been a long time and I thought this was supposed to be the end of it.

But she kept going. She didn't break up with me the day after. She told me we had to talk about it. We met again, but it felt bad.

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Motivational story (tag those who you think might need a boost) - read in full, pls 

Then, one time, I told her I didn't want to break up with her. That was it, I did not want to do something she did.

And when I left for the night and went home, it hit me.

"Why am I telling her to break up with me? I should either get the balls to break it off, or tell her how I feel and FIX this. Either way, this was not just HER decision!"

This Eureka moment resulted in a long-ass text message.

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Motivational story (tag those who you think might need a boost) - read in full, pls 

In it, I described my own feelings as I had them. I always cared a lot about what my GF thought, but not now. Too long have I been thrown around by other people. I put all my life's meaning and energy into this relationship. So much so that I completely forgot about the part that made up 50% of it.

I forgot myself. I gave up everything, I literally jumped as she wanted.

I wanted to be spineless no longer.

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Motivational story (tag those who you think might need a boost) - read in full, pls 

And I told her as such. I wanted to turn around. I knew she didn't like how I didn't take care of myself, I turned into a slob over the last 2-ish years. The last year, I was extremely lazy.

I always told myself "There's time, I'll start working out and get into shape when I have more time!" I had it planned that I'd get into shape by 27. But that would be too late.

Right now, it was 5 minutes to midnight.

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Motivational story (tag those who you think might need a boost) - read in full, pls 

When I sent the message, there was no reply for about 15 minutes. After that I read the following:

"Jesus Christ. You nailed it."

After that, we talked in earnest. For the first time in a year, maybe. I finally saw what she wanted and what I wasn't: I was not a man she could be proud about. I had turned into the proverbial fat chick: Nice to ride, but not something you want to be seen with in public.

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Motivational story (tag those who you think might need a boost) - read in full, pls 

I had been dragged about for too long. By my family, by my jobs, by her, even! I was a spineless dragabout who everyone could manipulate and do with as they pleased. My self-confidence didn't allow me to tell someone no.

I knew what I had to do. I needed to grow my balls back. Somewhere along the road, I snipped them off, tore out my spine, and now I needed them more than ever.

This was the start.

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Motivational story (tag those who you think might need a boost) - read in full, pls 

This was the time I started working out. I was still at 20-30kg lifts, but I needed more time.

I told her so, and she agreed that she would wait for me to get better. I knew it was not only about the body, so I told her that now it was my turn: I would NOT let go of her.

How lazy could I be that I wouldn't even fight to save a relationship that I was happy in? Didn't I deserve to be happy?

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Motivational story (tag those who you think might need a boost) - read in full, pls 

Contrary to what I thought, I DID deserve to be happy. And I was done dancing to other people's music.

This is a section of what I wrote her in my text. Now was the time to keep my word:

"Fuck what YOU want. You keep saying you don't deserve me, and you don't. You're not getting rid of me this easily. From now on, it's my rules."

I wanted to change overnight. She did, too.

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Motivational story (the turning point, at last) 

If you read up to here, congratulations. Let's keep going.

I had more motivation than ever to move up with my workouts. That morning, I was more hyped than ever in my life.

After that, all turned up. I started taking care of myself, because I finally realized that not devotion to a relationship, but the devotion to oneself is what keeps relationships alive.

I now wear a ring. To me, it signifies my newfound self-devotion.

(it opens beer, too.)

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Motivational story (the turning point, at last) 

In the morning, I recounted everything I was good at. Not the things OTHER people were good at, but what I was good at.

I am a ferocious fighter. I am a wireless wizard. I can talk to anyone I want, zero shame. I could literally walk up to ANYONE anywhere, no matter how threatening they looked and ask them to do something for me.

I was dangerous. This was the man I could be proud of.

And I'd rather rot in hell than let that man die.

Motivational story (the turning point, at last) 

So, what can YOU take away from this story of a man who dove to rock bottom, and is currently floating to the surface again?

1) Even if I may not be good at something you are good at, I am unique and I sure as shit am good at something.
2) I may not be as great as you are, but I'll catch up to you. Just you wait.
3) If you don't say anything, nothing will happen.
4) If you want something to happen, you can make it happen.

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Motivational story 

This is the story. It may not be yours, it's mine.
You may be somewhere else, either behind me or futher ahead, but I work at my own pace.

This is the basis of my road to becoming a demigod.

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